Why People Matter

Story 1

This world is full of people, the economy is built on people by people. When you receive money, it comes from another person by trading something of value. Money is mostly made of cotton, a lightweight material that can be turned into digits instead of carrying the weight and risk of gold. It feels weird but it doesn’t matter as this system works right now.

Dealing with people is going to be important. In a world full of people it makes sense that excellent communication skills are going to be crucial. The better those communication skills, the more you get your way. It’s essential to negotiate and convince in a kind and balanced matter.

I used to live in a shared apartment. A person refused to do their cleaning tasks. Was I supposed to get angry and report them to the landlord? Yes, perhaps, but within a couple of minutes I managed to convince them to join us in the cleaning process. I went and explained how this causes everyone else to have more work and the mood of our apartment would change. He seemed to understand and we continued as usual. As usual, with now a clean apartment.

There are levels to those negotiations in every area of life. The better you handle those situations, the better the reward.

Story 2

I was looking for a book supplier, I needed a lot of books, a constant supply. I couldn’t find a reliable source. I was in Germany back then. I asked a friend if he wants to join a 3 hour ride to a nearby city. He accepted and we went there. We found a medium sized thrift shop without many hopes. Out of curiosity we started scanning the books to flip them.

The shop owner was furious because of the scanning and insisted that we stop and leave as it might bother the customers. My friend wanted to move on to the next thrift shop before things got heated. I immediately apologized and proceeded to have a chat about how well she was running the shop. She became much nicer and we continued talking. After a while she offered the books she had in her warehouse. We then headed back our ways with the van filled up with books.

Franziska would later become one of the best and cheapest book supplier for the next years to come.

Story 3

Joe had always believed that the world was a simple place and that he was the smartest person.

He spoke loudly and constantly. If someone started a sentence, Joe made sure to finish it.

One night, he went to a casino with some friends. He didn’t understand blackjack, but that didn’t stop him from explaining it to everyone on the table.

Soon, he was down to his last chips. His friends were quiet. The dealer stayed as usual. Joe slammed his hands on the table. “This place is a joke. You people think you’re clever, but I’ve seen through the system.” He scooped his remaining chips and threw them across the table. They scattered, a few hitting the dealer’s hands.

The table went silent. Security arrived within seconds. Joe argued the whole way to the door, explaining how the casino didn’t understand probability and how everyone inside was just lucky or stupid. They handed him a paper: Banned for one year.

Another day, he lost a used laptop sale online. A buyer asked a simple question about the battery. He replied, “Read the description before asking stupid questions.” The buyer stopped responding and he never sold the laptop.

On the other hand,

Kevin wasn’t the smartest person in the room. He listened carefully, did not interrupted and spoke only after others had finished.

When Kevin put his old car up for sale, he priced it fairly, carefully answered every question, sent videos, and invited buyers to see it in person, taking the extra time and effort to make the process easy for the buyer.

The car was sold. All 8 interested buyers were treated with importance.

Kevin followed a key sales rule: he let the buyer speak most of the time, listening carefully and only stepping in occasionally to guide the conversation towards closing.

Story Summary

You are constantly getting your way, meeting in the middle or not having your way in everyday life. Winning is important over long periods of time.

Being nice matters, but so does listening. The more you pay attention to what others are saying, the faster you can connect and earn their trust getting you further in life.

Action Prompts

Grab a pen and paper, take action, and question yourself along the way:

Listening vs Talking

• Who is doing most of the talking?
• How does listening shape the way others perceive you?
• Do I want to win in life and start getting my way?

The Power of Silence

You don’t always need to be the center of attention. Staying quiet, observing, and listening is just as powerful. People can spot inauthenticity, which destroys credibility, while genuine effort and quality are always recognized and rewarded.

• How often do I actually listen to conversations compared to how much I talk?
• Can I identify moments when staying quiet might give me an advantage?
• How can I tell if someone perceives me as genuine or inauthentic?
• How can I make sure my actions and words consistently reflect authenticity?

Respond, Don’t React

Always respond calmly say sorry, agree, or listen. Keep a neutral expression, no matter what you hear. Take your time to analyze internally before reacting or overreacting. If the offer isn’t favorable, don’t be afraid to negotiate or walk away, better opportunities will appear.

• How do I usually react when I hear something I don’t like or disagree with?
• Do I give myself enough time to process information before responding?
• Do I give myself enough time to process information before responding?
• What techniques can I use to maintain a neutral expression even in stressful situations?

Using Leverage

Know when you hold leverage and use it wisely. For instance, I wanted to sell my phone for 450. When the buyer asked my price, I stayed silent and had him make the first offer. He offered 500, and I accepted more than my initial expectation. Had I named my price first, I would have earned less.

• How can I identify when I actually have leverage in a situation?
• Do I tend to reveal my position or desires too early, and how has that affected past deals?
• What strategies can I use to let the other party reveal their intentions first?
• After a negotiation, how can I analyze what worked and what could be improved for next time?

Asking, Apologizing, and Growth

Never hesitate to ask. The worst answer you can get is no, and it shouldn’t affect you. The more no’s you hear, the easier it becomes to handle rejections. Don’t hesitate to say sorry when you’re wrong. Accept it, promise to improve, and move on. People respect honesty and should respond positively.

• How often do I hold back from asking because I fear rejection?
• Is the reward worth giving it my all for a no?
• What emotional reaction do I have when I hear “no,” and why?
• Do I tend to personalize rejection, and how can I separate it from my self-worth?
• When was the last time I admitted I was wrong, and how did it feel?
• Do I avoid saying sorry out of pride, and what is that costing me?
• What steps can I take to genuinely promise improvement after an error?
• Do I see mistakes as failures or as opportunities to grow?